Sunday, December 15, 2013

The End of the Year is Coming and I Have Thoughts

The end of the year always seems to creep up on me, it's only really two weeks away now! And I have all these posts I want to get done before then, so if I'm really ambitious, there might be a flurry of activity here.

I just really want to start the new year fresh in so many ways. If there's been a theme to my life in 2013, it's been "letting go." Like I wrote in my post when I ended BBAW, I have a really hard time with that, I often hold on for much longer than is really right. Some of the letting go I've done in 2013 has been freeing and felt wonderful, while some of it is more painful and a work in progress. But there's something about the end of the year and the holidays and the start of a new one that gives us a chance to dream that we, too, can be different!

So I want to keep 2013 in 2013--anything I don't manage to write about, I won't. But I might spam you with posts! Plus, I'm hoping to do a few things for the War & Peace carnival. I finished War & Peace guys! It is a good feeling.

I also had a pretty big revelation the other day about my blog. I think I've always thought that despite all my posts about blogging and how I know it's different etc, and my own blog has been different now for a few years, I think somewhere in the back of my mind I've kept thinking that I will somehow return it to its glory days. By which I mean, someday I will suddenly find 30 extra hours in the week to go back to posting daily sometimes multiple times per day all the while visiting every blog ever. And it's so odd because I think in my conscious mind I haven't thought that at all, but as I was thinking out some feature I wanted to do and the book I'd need to read, etc. I just had this jolt's never going to happen. There is simply NO WAY that I can do that and do everything else I need to do in life. And it was an odd feeling, because I hadn't realized that I just somehow was still thinking somewhere this was a temporary thing. But it isn't. Of course it isn't. Those days are over forever, they are never coming back.

I've had that jolt of reality on a few fronts lately and I never had realized how delusional I was before. But as with anything, there's something freeing about letting go of the past and just embracing as fully as you can the present and the future. Like if I stopped thinking about what I'd like to do with my blog, all the things I'll never have time to do but think about, how much more time will I have to devote to other things? How good would it feel to free myself of such a weird mindset I got trapped in so long ago where I was thinking about the blog?

I'm not saying that I'm quitting or anything just in case there's some confusion.

In other news...well there really isn't any other news. I've read two books lately, besides War & Peace, Skating on Air which I will hopefully review this week, and Lost Lake by Sarah Addison Allen which was so so lovely, like so sad and hopeful all at once. It was one of those books that had a few lines that just really really resonated. It is out in January.

TV is mostly over save for fun Christmas specials. I am watching Nikita but wow this season's concept is just wayyyyy over the top for me. I think the six episode format is hurting it. Plus, what I loved most about the show is the relationships and they are mostly backseat to plot, plot, plot. Oh and I caught up on The Carrie Diaries and wow this season is just super charming. I lost interest in the first season, but felt there was still some potential and I think they hit the sweet spot in this second season. But mostly I'm really looking forward to how crazy busy the spring will be with shows I love! Plus, the Olympics!

Christmas shopping was almost impossible for me this year, I don't even know. I usually love it, but this year was just super tough. How is it going for you guys?


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