Reflecting on the Year in Books and Book Blogging

2011 feels like it was a big year for change in a lot of ways--in publishing, books, how and why we read what we do, and also book blogging itself. Maybe some of these changes are just changes for me...I once rode in on a new wave of book blogging and now something else has taken its place and at times I feel a bit lost. I've had to evaluate exactly what I'm doing and why and what matters most to me in all of this, otherwise I'd probably just stop altogether...I very nearly did this year, after all. I've watched some of my own favorite book bloggers drop the title of book blogger--something we used to be proud of that sort of...bonded us together as a community? others leave Twitter, many go professional, and still others nearly disappear altogether. I used to feel like I had a sort of segment of the community that I belonged to, but there have been so many divisions now, some of them ugly, some just the natural way things progress as time passes. And yet...despite all of this, there's a warmth I feel when in the company of fellow readers, a way that blogging about books is a part of my life that I don't want to lose. YOU all are part of my life and I don't want to lose you even if I can't be a book blogger in the way that I used to. And so I guess that's what I learned at the end of the day, that what I value about book blogging the most are the connections and friends that I've made along the way, and the way I've learned to think smarter and better about what I read. There's something so comforting about knowing that while we each live our own lives, we also share a sort of life on our blogs. I like it. Let's not kill it completely okay? Evolution is a weird thing, and this evolving as a blogger thing has been one of the most interesting for me, because I certainly never expected to find myself at this particular point. In short? What I care about: reading good books, talking about them, making and keeping good friends, being smarter, and having a record of what I've read in a year. What I don't care about: Discovering the next great book, having a million readers that I have no interaction with, marketing and selling books just for the sake of marketing and selling books. Admittedly, I used to have a lot of internal conflict over some of these, but not anymore.

As far as the actual title of book blogger...well I still consider myself one because that IS what I blog the most about, but it doesn't really matter to me one way or another. I didn't originally create this blog to be a book blog and I do blog about other stuff so if that doesn't make me a book blogger so be it.

But! On top of all that stuff, I thought this post I wrote back at the beginning of the year was very timely. In A Dying Way of Life, I discussed how I could see our bookish way of life coming to an end. And since then I watched another used local bookstore close and just today (well on Thursday when you read this) I learned the local Book Warehouse is closing. I just feel so much grief and some of it is ridiculous because it's not like I NEED physical bookstores, it's just that I have a really hard time letting things go. I don't know if I will like a world better where we all read on electronic devices and our interests are even more divided and fragmented than ever before. I will miss just browsing the shelves, eavesdropping on complete strangers' bookish conversations and just being in a place where books matter. Who knows what 2012 holds? I wouldn't be surprised if one of the big things that happens is that even more bookstores close.

In other news, a few other of my favorite posts this year:

My post about Reader's Block

Jealousy and Book Bloggers

I also admitted that I prefer female authors to male authors, and don't feel guilty about it. Much.

And just for nostalgia's sake, my tumblr post about missing the early days of book blogging.

I'm sure the coming year will bring many other changes to my blogging life and reading life, and hopefully personal life as well. But I do hope I'll be back at the end of 2012 to review the year once again. :)

Reading Goals for 2012

One of the advantages of writing the blog for me is the ability to look back at what I've written and see what I was thinking about and what happened during the year. For some reason, I tend to forget like..January through April especially, they feel like a different year or something.

I was especially interested in looking back at this year because somewhere along the way I almost fully dropped out of the reading and book blogging thing for awhile. And I was kind of wondering what was going on before that happened, and I do feel like I have a lot more clarity at the end of the year about how things progressed.

It's funny because in 2010, I had a sort of reading crisis where I was trying to figure out what I was doing with my reading life and I wrote post after post about how I wanted my reading to mean something, about how I wanted to read more socially, I wanted to spend more time on the books I was reading, etc. And for some RIDICULOUS reason, I thought the solution was to plan themed weeks and readalongs. And while that makes a certain kind of sense, it was just another way of boxing in my reading life. So basically I failed in every goal I made for myself with regards to reading.

So here are a few of my plans for my 2012 reading life.

Nothing is set in stone.

I have a few reading challenges projects I intend to tackle but I don't even want to write about them here. Somehow, if they exist only in my mind, I feel more like I will actually do them for the joy of it. Also if I don't finish them it will be no big deal. These are mostly focused on large overarching themes. I'll let you know if I complete them!

No more challenges.

I got antsy a few times wanting to sign up for challenges in the past month as every blogger unveils their shiny new challenges for 2012, but the truth is I just can't. I never complete them anyway and usually they just lead to a book acquisition binge which leads to more books sitting around that I feel stressed about not reading. So I will not be joining any challenges this year. I will also not be hosting any. The Buy One Book and Read It Challenge was originally conceived to encourage people to read who normally don't, then I expanded it to encourage people to buy books. But I don't think it's making any actual difference at the moment so it's time to lay it to rest.

Read where my interests take me

This should be so obvious, but I'm so often scheduled to the max with commitments that there a lot of books I want to read that I don't have time to read. And then this past year I flaked out on almost every commitment. So I want to give myself room to just go where my interests are taking me in the moment.

Still, I should challenge myself

I don't want to become a lazy reader, so I do want to challenge myself in some ways. So for me that's going to mean that I'm going to read a bit outside of my comfort zone...I'd like to read 3 nonfiction (non-memoir), 3 books of poetry (stole this from Ana), 3 graphic novels, 3 short story collections, and 3 classics. Hopefully I'll be able to do more than that in some categories, but I think I need to be more conscious about diversifying my reading.

Keep Track of My Reading

I've never been one who can track what I read, but I intend to try this year. It will give me a good idea, I hope, of how diversely I read and where I'm spending my time. Kind of like how when you're making a budget you write down every penny you spend.

Finally, I do have a list of books I'd like to try to read this year. Most of these are from last year's challenge list that I didn't get to, but still very much want to read.

The Yearling by Marjorie Rawlings

1984 by George Orwell

Watership Down by Richard Adams

Germinal by Emile Zola

Strong Poison by Dorothy Sayers

Saints in Limbo by River Jordan

Shadow of the Wind by Carlos Ruiz Zafon

A Prayer for Owen Meany by John Irving

Lilith by George Macdonald

Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy

Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides

Fingersmith by Sarah Waters

Plus all of the Faith and Fiction Round Table books.

Sooooo...those are my goals. My main hope for 2012 is to rediscover my joy of reading. What are your goals?

2011 -- The Year in Books

I am so hesitant about posting this two days early, especially as I have a long day of travel on the 30th during which I will probably read at least one more book. But I am not going to get another chance to really write for awhile, so here goes! (Also these are my favorite reads of the year, not necessarily books published in 2011)

You Are My Only by Beth Kephart (I never wrote a review)

This year was really kind of strange for me, and there were periods of time where I struggled a lot with just feeling down. It's weird, too, how sometimes you don't see that if you aren't enjoying the things you used to love you might be depressed? Even if you don't recognize it as such at the time. Well that was this year and reading for me. I don't even know how to explain it, but it was a really tough reading year. And so I actually put off reading You Are My Only for a time, because it's Beth's book and I wanted to love it and not read it when I hated the very thought of reading. I don't even remember why I finally picked it up, but I read it straight through staying up until the early morning hours, and weeping as I reached the end of the book. Beth masterfully tells two stories simultaneously of two girls that are in need of hope. And hope doesn't come wrapped in bright packages, it comes in its hard won way and it's difficult and hard but it's there. I love her use of language, theme, and her eye for detail, but mostly I love, will always love that healing and hope and freedom come through human interaction in her stories. We reach out to one another, we love each other, and we heal each other in our own stumbling, clumsy way. In You are My Only especially it's the art of food and the treasure of shared story that build bonds. THIS IS A BEAUTIFUL BOOK and obviously it's a very personal read for me, but you should still read it. I don't really understand how it didn't win all the awards, tbqh.

You Know When the Men are Gone by Siobhan Fallon

This stunning collection of short stories about life for military spouses has stayed with me to this day. I can still vividly recall certain scenes out of the collection, and I still recommend it every chance I get. The stories are connected in loose ways through one major event that takes place and seeing how that impacts the lives of various people at Fort Hood is an effective storytelling technique. While some stories might be a bit weaker than others, the writing is enjoyable and believable throughout the book.

Night Road by Kristin Hannah

I sat down and read Night Road in one day, I did not want to stop. It was such a satisfying read, because Hannah developed her characters so well and clearly laid out their paths. It was impossible not to become invested in their stories, to feel their loss, and celebrate their hard earned victories. I cried A LOT during this book and understood for the first time why Kristin Hannah is such a beloved author.

The First Husband by Laura Dave

Laura Dave's The First Husband is a smart, funny, and touching book about a woman who has to learn to choose what she can live with and what she can't live without. I loved following Annie's journey of facing down her fears, embracing freedom, and learning who she was. Months later and I'm still recommending it to everyone!

A Canticle for Liebowitz by Walter M. Miller Jr.

This was a book for Faith and Fiction's Round Table last year that I found a complete chore to read. I think it took me something like three weeks to read and I was apologizing all over the place to the group for being so late. But it's not a bad book, just very difficult. And the ideas...so many ideas are raised in the book that are fascinating to contemplate. So even though this wasn't a book I had to read all at once, it has stayed with me since I read it and I realize that is a very good book, a book I'm really glad to have read and may even read again one day. A Canticle for Liebowitz is comprised of three novellas that take a look at a post-apocaplyptic society's attempts to rebuild itself over the ages.

Bel Canto by Ann Patchett

I have a thing for stories about people coming together in unlikely circumstances and creating something new together and Bel Canto fits that to perfection. Add in some tragedy and reverence for music and you pretty much have my ideal book. I loved this one a lot, and I anticipate the characters staying with me for a long time.

The Pirate Queen by Patricia Hickman

I remember being so surprised to discover this beautifully written book. Hickman masterfully creates the inner world of her protagonist so that you know exactly who she is. As she battles her own disappointment with her life and eventually learns to unearth the treasures all around her, it's hard not to feel hope bloom in your own heart. Loved it.

Paradise Valley by Dale Cramer

Hands down the best Amish book there is! I love how Cramer draws on his own family history to tell a story about a people who feel called apart but must come to terms with the way in which the world is colliding with their own. The very practical question of pacifism vs. protection is explored. And the women feeling stifled is actually addressed! And they are even forced to confront their racism. I don't know, I just loved that this book manages to depict the Amish with tremendous sympathy and fairness while also exploring the obstacles they face in trying to live out their faith. I have the second book in my possession now and I'm very happy about it!

This was kind of a strange reading year in that I didn't read many of the big titles and I flaked out on pretty much every commitment I tried to make for myself. I'll share more about that later, but these are the books I read that really made a big impression on me. I'm curious if I have ANY overlap at all with anyone else since it's kind of a strange list.

2011 -- The Year In TV

When I was getting ready to start writing about the year in TV, at first I was thinking it wasn't that great, but in actuality, it was really great. It's just that nothing has come along that fills the LOST void and I realize I'm still searching even though the truth is that I may never again love a show or the experience of watching a show like I loved LOST. IT'S SAD, Y'ALL.

Having said that there was so much to love on TV in 2011 for me. Starting with....

The Dan and Blair show.
Gossip Girl itself, while being an interesting show conceptually, consistently fails to live up to its promise. I was reading old blog posts a few weeks ago and laughing at myself for how many times I said I was hanging onto Gossip Girl by the thinnest of strands. And that was true last year as well but then Dan and Blair happened, and it was like a completely different show. I don't exactly know what happy accident created them, but they are the only reason I'm still watching this mess. And I've come to accept that Gossip Girl is a show I may not understand until it's over. Even so Dan and Blair are one of the most fun and cute TV pairings I've ever had the misfortune to fall in love with.

The Vampire Diaries

I have to admit I haven't exactly felt the show in the same way I did in the first season and beginning of the second, but even so this year has been a lot of fun. I really loved the progression of Tyler and Caroline's relationship until it turned into a plot driven mess recently, I enjoyed getting to know Elijah better and the introduction of Rebekah, and the Chicago 1920's episode is one of my favorite ever of the series. Ripper Stefan has been loads of fun! And I know I'm in the minority but I don't mind Klaus too much and sometimes think Joseph Morgan does quite a good job as him. In short, The Vampire Diaries is still a really engrossing hour of TV and I love that so many people watch it so it can be a lot of fun to talk about!

Switched at Birth

This show took me completely by surprise. I expected it to be a somewhat ridiculous Lifetime movie-esque show, but it's actually a lot of fun. And it has so much heart. I like that the primary characters are the girls and their mothers and that the show takes the time to explore the complexities in their evolving relationships, their sense of identity, and their roles within their families. And it doesn't hurt that there's so much representation. It's actually been pretty educational for me to read the reactions of people to the depiction of the deaf community. It's a show I consistently look forward to watching, and I'm so glad it's coming back January 3rd!!

The Walking Dead

Yay zombies! No seriously, it was fair to wonder if The Walking Dead could live up to its first season promise. I mean seriously what happens after you blow up the CDC? But I feel like the show did a great job in the first half of the second season by creating a dilemma between Rick and Shane and posing the question of who could better protect the group. And the ultimate manifestation of that was in looking for Sophia and the culmination of it took place when they found her. The addition of the characters on the farm and their quest to save the zombies was interesting as well and the episode where Shane and Otis went to the school and Shane killed Otis for his own survival was a chilling hour of television. I like the added drama, the increased human tension and conflict, and I'm very much looking forward to where the show goes next.

Breaking Bad

So I have to admit, I was impatient with the first half of season four in a way I haven't been impatient with the show in a long time. But then...halfway through things started to pick up the pace. And I have to say...watching the finale of Breaking Bad this year ranks up there as one of the best hours of television I have ever seen. I was so surprised and just blown away. I was completely surprised by everything that happened and I felt like every reveal was perfectly timed. Watching Walt and Jesse's relationship continues to be absolutely fascinating and I'm very curious to see how they start wrapping things up.

Downton Abbey

I arrived late to this gem and I have only seen the first season so far. I was so reluctant to actually watch it because I generally have an aversion to period pieces and it was also on Masterpiece which sounds like TV you should watch rather than TV you watch because you love it. I can't help it y'all, I still love The CW you know? I quickly watched the entire first season in two days, and loved it! I loved of course the soaptastic drama and most of the characters, but I also just really really love the look of it. I love the costumes and I got the book The World of Downton Abbey for Christmas and flipping through (it covers both seasons so I'm a bit hesitant to dig in quite yet) the photos are just stunning. It's so visually pleasing!

Parks and Recreation

Another show I was pretty whatever about watching as I generally don't enjoy comedies, but I'm glad I decided to watch because I love it. I haven't seen any of this season yet, but I quickly devoured the first three seasons. And I laughed! And I enjoyed the characters and I just love the friendship between Leslie and Anne. It really is a kind of humor I enjoy and now I'm trying to get everyone else I know to watch if they don't already.

The World Series

All of these shows were great and everything but nothing was as fun as watching the St. Louis Cardinals beat the Texas Rangers in the World Series. The season didn't necessarily start out great for the Cardinals but sometime midway through after making some staffing changes they started to gel and come together....all the way to the playoffs. And then all the way to the World Series. And it wasn't just any World Series, it was a closely matched one, filled with great drama all the way up until the sixth game which was...well it's the stuff a baseball fan's dreams are made of when the Cardinals came back not once, but twice in extra innings to eventually win the game. It was completely thrilling. I still get excited thinking about it. I was never happier to be a Cardinals fan!
In writing my year end lists I almost feel like TV was the best! I mean I haven't even talked about The Closer or Nikita which I also thought were top notch. But enough about what I like...what were your favorite TV shows and TV moments this year?

2011 -- The Year in Film

2010 was the year I went to the cinema like twice a week, and 2011 was the year I barely went at all. Seriously, I was trying to figure out if I've even watched enough movies this year--who cares what year they are from--that I liked well enough to make a post about them. I decided I have and alas 50% of them are not from 2011.

When it comes to popcorn flicks they really don't get much better than Rise of the Planet of the Apes. I was totally engrossed in this rebooted franchise in a surprising way and felt genuine feelings for Caesar and couldn't help but cheer on his clever antics. Even though it's just a fun action movie, it reminded me of how much animals deserve our respect and the complicated relationship between humanity and the animal kingdom. It was completely entertaining and a lot of fun.

High Noon is a classic western that I was surprised to love completely. I have to admit I generally have an aversion to old films, but many that have endured, have endured for a reason and High Noon is no exception. It's full of really great mystery and tension as Will Kane tries to rally people behind him to protect the town. As each person turns him down and his sense of defeat grows, it's hard not to wonder just why he's doing what he's doing. He's a very rootable character, his sense of integrity and justice make it so. And yet, there's still some interesting stuff in this movie to mine for me, such as his pacifist wife using the gun to protect him in the end. Is pacifism as an ideal completely impossible? In any case, Grace Kelly is lovely on screen and High Noon is a movie I can easily see myself revisiting.

The Landlord is an older movie that just came out on DVD for the first time this year and it's actually great. I was surprised by just how much I enjoyed this somewhat unusual film about an young affluent white man who buys property in Park Slope with the hope of eventually building a luxury home for himself. He quickly begins to learn a lesson about the people who are already there. But not in any Hallmark movie sort of way, the movie feels full of the rough and raw pull of life. And it asks some pretty decent questions about race, identity, belonging, and home. The depiction of Elgar's rebellion against his parents way of life all while he still benefits from it is also interesting and well done. To top it off, the behind the scenes making of the film is fascinating stuff to read. The film was before its time in many ways and is well worth watching.

Hands down, the best film I watched this year was The Tree of Life. It's not only that the acting and cinematography are outstanding, it's that somehow this unusual film beckoned me in and made me feel life in this really deep and experiential way. All of the moments of life, all of these tiny moments of life that shape and form us are captured and breathed into being on screen in a way that allows you to see how they are woven together to make the fabric of who we are. Seemingly insignificant moments are treated with beauty and dignity and celebrated as the miracles they are. And as innocence is lost, and the world loses its glimmer and becomes the hard place where we love and lose and wrestle daily against the heat of our own desires, you feel it in the movie. And you feel that hope, that indeed, one day "we'll understand all things" it's just..impossible not to cry? I don't know, I did. I thought this was a beautiful film that celebrates the sacredness and mystery of life.

One thing I noticed this year more than any other is just how many male narratives were being told to me. Every movie I listed above is about a man and told from his perspective. I saw Super 8, Captain America, and Crazy Stupid Love all about men. (I really really liked Crazy Stupid Love but the hammering home of the message that you should always fight for THE ONE keeps me from being able to love it wholeheartedly) and then when there was a movie with a strong female narrative, The Help (a great movie from that perspective in that it dealt primarily with the very many different ways women relate to each other) it's riddled with controversy. I just feel sad about this. There are probably some great indie films I missed this year, admittedly, I didn't see a lot, but there's definitely room for more blockbuster type films that tell great stories from the woman's perspective.

Alas, an honorable mention on this to Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part 2 for just being pure joy and a lot of fun to go see!
What were your favorite movies that you watched this year?

2011 -- The Year in Music

So the truth is that while I love music, I tend to listen to the same stuff OVER AND OVER again. I don't necessarily discover a lot of new music in any given year, because I listen to the same old stuff I've always been listening to. I will buy some new music, but honestly, I spent weeks at a time listening to old CDs like they were new ones. So only a few new albums every year join the collection of music that I anticipate continuing to listen to for years in the future or that I have some sort of insane love affair with for a period of time. This year more than any other seemed like there wasn't a lot of new music that I truly loved. I mean I loved Florence + The Machine's Ceremonials (which was later tainted by the racist video) and The Decemberists The King is Dead but they felt very much like in the moment albums I don't know how much staying power they will have for me. On top of that, there's a small stack of CDs that while I've listened to them, I haven't had the time to really sit with them. (Sara Groves, Shaun Groves, Ginny Owens, Jason Gray)

So after that rather ridiculous explanation/excuse here's what I heard this year that I loved, that I think I will still be listening to in 2012 and beyond.

The Civil Wars Barton Hollow is probably my favorite CD of the whole year. I love it, I love everything about it. When I first heard The Civil Wars, it had that familiar feeling that always accompanies falling in love with something...like you're finding something you've been looking for all along. Maybe it's the style of the music..a sort of pop/folk vibe, or the raw longing some of the songs convey, I don't exactly know. All I know is that some of the songs have a beauty that pierces me right in the heart. I was so addicted to this album for SO LONG and even now it's a pure joy to listen to it.

I've heard of Over the Rhine for awhile and just ignored them, but I finally gave in to buying this album when people were raving about it and I am so glad I did. Over the Rhine's The Long Surrender is a very beautiful very different sort of album for me. I really love it, though, and I hope to have the time to discover more of their music in the future. (I did download Snow Angels for Christmas) "Oh Yeah by the Way" is one of my favorite songs brimming over with sadness and...a kind of familiarity even if I don't share the exact same circumstances as the songwriters. "All my Favorite People" is probably my other favorite on the album, for some reason it feels like a church song.

I'm starting to sense a theme. I like melancholy stuff. And Feist's Metals is certainly that, it's very melancholy. And yet I listened to it for days on end. If there's sadness here, it's wrapped in a very beautiful package, the kind I can listen to again and again.

I was so pleasantly surprised the day this live CD of Andrew Peterson's was released. I figured we'd have to wait ages to get anything at all. I can never have enough of Andrew Peterson's music so this live recording was a great treat. It's mostly songs from Counting Stars but it also includes a cover of a Rich Mullins song which is fantastic and beautiful and "High Noon" which is like, my favorite Easter song ever. If you like deep, thoughtful, poetic, beautiful, Christian music than you should be listening to Andrew Peterson.

And...that's it. Like I said, there's still some music from the year that I feel like I haven't really spent enough time with and there's plenty that I have yet to buy and listen to. Oh, I also really liked David Bazan's Strange Negotiations but for some reason, I haven't really connected with it like Curse Your Branches--I mean, I had a very intense experience with Curse Your Brances I guess there was no way that could be replicated, I just expected to like it more somehow? But even so, I do really like it. I DON'T KNOW IF THIS MAKES SENSE.

So that's me and my year in significant music. What did you listen to and fall in love with this year?

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!

Merry Christmas friends! I hope that no matter where you are and what's happening in your life at the moment that you will know joy and peace this holiday season. I hope that even a fraction of the kindness you have shown me comes back to you!

If you don't celebrate, well happy weekend. :)

I'll be back next week with my best of 2011 posts in music, film, TV, and books and maybe some other stuff thrown in as well.

The 12 Days of Christmas at There's a Book

My good friend Danielle has been doing the 12 Days of Christmas at There's a Book, where bloggers have been sharing some of their favorite holiday stories for children.

I took the opportunity to write about Great Joy by Kate DiCamillo again, a book I simply love to death and I hope you'll go read my post, read the book, and also leave a comment! :)

Let's Revive This Old Interview Game!

So I was reading through my posts this year working on a year end retrospective (also the ultimate exercise in narcissism!*) and um I ended up going back quite a bit farther when I came across that old meme where you leave a comment on a blog asking to be interviewed by the blogger. Do you remember that one? So basically I would answer five interview questions and then you'd leave a comment and I'd ask you five questions you'd answer on your blog.

Okay these were the official rules:

Leave me a comment saying, "Interview Me." Please include your e-mail address if it is not in your profile. (lol how old school)

I will respond by emailing you five questions. (I get to pick the questions.)

You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.

You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.

When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

It sounds really formal, yikes. Anyway, I thought since it's a holiday week basically it might be kind of fun to try to revive that since it doesn't require too much thinking. Since I'm starting it though I don't have any actual interview questions to answer. So, I'll try to answer the first five questions left in comments and update this post with them. And YOU leave me a request to be interviewed, please! I promise not to ask anything too personal or invasive. I hope you'll play along!

ETA--Hannah asked: How many books did you DNF this year? ha, since I don't actually keep track of my reading I'm not sure, but I'd say between 50 and 100.

Florinda asked: What are TWO things you'd like to do differently in your blogging next year? 1) I want to go where my interests take me. I've tried blogging according to a schedule and themes and ideas for years now and I burned out so hard this year that I think I'll be happier if I go where my natural interests take me. 2) I want to blog smarter. Ha ha, that will be hard, but I want to dig deep, be real, and be interesting.


*It is REALLY embarrassing to read old posts like, whoa. At the same time, sometimes I think I used to be smarter than I am now. Also, I WAS A GUSHING FANGIRL OVER LOST. And wow I was also exhausted looking at how much I used to try to do. Here's to getting older and learning how to relax. There is no such thing as queen of the blogosphere and I'm glad I'm no longer trying to be that.

Giveaway: Mary's Son by Darryl Nyznyk

Mary’s Son: A Tale of Christmas (Cross Dove Publishing), winner of three Mom’s Choice Awards, is a modern-day story in which a mysterious old man named Nicholas shares the true meaning of Christmas with two young people. Sarah Stone is an 11-year-old rich girl who lives “on the hill” amid butlers, nannies, housekeepers, and a father who is too busy for her. Jared Roberts is a 13-year-old tough kid from the “sink” on the other side of town where he and his gang barely survive broken families. Both Jared and Sarah struggle with holes in their family lives: Jared’s father left his family in poverty, while Sarah lost her mother as an infant. On the night that Jared plans to burglarize Sarah’s home, the two are whisked back in time by Nicholas, to witness a Christmas from long ago where they learn the meaning of life in a way they never imagined. Together, their personal anger and hurt dissolves, inspiring them to convey the true Christmas message to a cynical world. Mary’s Son is a story of youthful fears, passion, and tears that gives readers of all ages hope for a better world. Like the iconic Christmas image of Santa Claus kneeling before the manger, the story moves readers of multiple generations, as it allows parents to demonstrate the true meaning of Christmas, while still allowing young people to identify with the more secularized traditions of the season. “In a time of social divisiveness in our country, this story brings to the forefront the unifying values of honor, integrity and love on which America was built,” says Nyznyk. “This story will resonate with all who are tired of ‘political correctness’ and long for the unifying joy of the real Christmas.

For the entire month of December you can buy the Mary's Son ebook for only .99! I also have one hard copy to give away. To enter the giveaway just fill out the form below!

Virtual Advent

Welcome to Day 19 of the Virtual Advent!

I've been doing these for a few years now and I have to admit I wondered what I could do new this year. And I settled on sharing a few of my favorite Christmas things I might talk about less often.

I love these things so much! I think they are really underrated to be honest, people don't go around talking about how great they are. But really, there's nothing better than the sweet candy cane flavor followed by a burst of chocolate! And also it's really hard to stop at just one. Do yourself a favor and go get some right now! I didn't discover them until they were on sale after Christmas one year and I was buying them for my students (I'm cheap okay?), but now they are a must have every year.

It's a Wonderful Life is my favorite Christmas movie but I also really love Holiday Inn and watch it every year. It's absolutely a movie of its time, by which I mean racist and sexist. But the music is really lovely and the dancing is a lot of fun. And I love the idea of the Inn so much, a place open just on holidays where a special performance is put on centered around the holiday. And I think there's a lot of fun humor as well. For me, it's like the ultimate comfort movie. Also! This is the movie White Christmas was first performed in. It came first okay? Before the movie White Christmas

I don't read a lot of romance anymore, but I always love discovering a collection of Christmas novellas each year. For some reason, the shorter nature of the stories plus all the Christmas cheer makes Christmas romance novellas really appealing to me. I really really like the ones that are all connected in some way, like they all take place in the same town, or there's a recurring character, or the characters from one story pop up in another. The YA collection, Let it Snow by Maureen Johnson, John Green, and Lauren Myracle would be a good example of that. In any case, the one pictured here is one I plan to read this year!

Andrew Peterson must always be mentioned! This CD is a favorite as it goes through the whole story of Jesus starting from the Old Testament and I always cry the first time I listen to it every year. It's Andrew Peterson, y'all, and that means it's meaty, beautiful, touching, funny, artistic, lovely, and true. For me, it's a great way to keep the perspective of the season, and I can't imagine my Christmas season without it. I always wanted to go to the show they put on in Nashville every year, but it still hasn't happened.

Every woman in my family has this nativity set. When I was like..in middle school my mom and I discovered some of the pieces on sale without boxes for like a dollar. So we got it for my grandma, who had just started my mom on the set. Eventually my sister and I started collections as well. I think it's a really beautiful set, and it's fun to collect new pieces for it when you can. So while this is my favorite nativity, I just love them in general. I love looking at the different collections or sets people have. And I have to admit it was adorable when my nieces knew to say "Baby Jesus" before many other words when they were little. Seeing how children connect to the Christmas story helped me understand why it has remained such a deep and important part of my life to this day.

So those are some of the things I love about Christmas! I want to know if you share any of them. Also I recommend you go and visit the other great stops today at Rebecca Reads, In Spring is is the Dawn, and Lighting my Light. Happy Holidays everyone!

The Sunday Salon -- Next Week is Christmas

Hello friends!

Can you believe Christmas is next week? I cannot! For some reason December always flies by and I'm left wondering where it went. Tell me I'm not alone!

Also, this past week I returned to that thing called book blogging, and posted reviews of three books. The Talented Mr. Ripley, Mariette in Ecstasy, and The End of the Affair. I also announced a new format for the Faith and Fiction Round Table for 2012 and announced the very decreased number of books we'll be reading--4 and their titles. It's a very open format and so I'm begging you to hoping you'll join in! We also announced the 2011 INSPY winners. Some great books there!

Tis the time of year for people to put together books lists--I freaking love this time of year. I love the way people write about the books that have mattered to them in the past year, and my favorite place to find those kinds of reports is on The Millions with their Year in Reading posts. While I undoubtedly find some pretentious person apologizing for loving a book that is considered less than a masterpiece every year, I also find a delightful assortment of more obscure books or books I love being discovered and loved. It's really a great series. My favorite post so far this year was from Mark O'Connell who made me want to add every book he talked about to my wishlist. In fact his comparison of Gilead to The Tree of Life is the main reason it's on the FNFRT list for this coming year. And I've been feeling more and more that I should read Anna Karenina and his post made me want to read it almost immediately. Also, if you want to know how the Year in Reading series came to be, there's a great post at Electric Literature...it sounds a like how any blog features comes to be!

But I also love love love Hearts & Minds Bookstore's End of Year lists on the Booknotes blog. They put up a gift guide yesterday that had me adding to my wishlist like crazy. The books lean more to the nonfiction thinky side, but I am always looking for good recommendations in that area. And also The Book Smugglers' Smugglivus is always loads of fun.

In other book news of great importance, Beth Kephart has a two book deal with Philomel books which is AMAZING. I always breathe a sigh of relief knowing we'll get more of her amazing books. Also, read the lovely Christmas scene in You Are My Only, one of my top reads of the year, over at Marg's blog.

In light of the highly unnecessary The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo movie coming out, I thought this list of 11 Thoughts about Lisbeth Salander at The Rejectionist was interesting and pretty right on.

Some fashion designers sketched Katniss's "Girl on Fire" dress and uh...they are mostly horrible.

TV

So...this week I discovered that Doc Jensen is recapping American Horror Story which made my interest in the show rise about 100%. I loved his LOST recaps back in the day, and upon reading his recaps for AHS, I was similarly delighted. Can't help it, I like it when smart people make all sorts of references for me and sort of..put stories into a greater context. I'd mostly been watching the show without thinking about it, but it's nice to know (at the end of the season, lol)that I can read his recaps for more insight and interesting theories. Also...I don't know I thought these past two episodes were really strong. I really loved Violet telling off Tate and telling him he has to pay for what's he done and I loved the scene between Violet and Vivien at the end. AHS will never ever be a feel good show, but I'm curious to see how things wrap up for the season and what sort of set-up they do for season 2.

The Golden Globe nominations were announced. Whatever. I haven't seen very many films at all this year and I don't watch most of the TV shows. I do kind of hope Mireille Enos wins for The Killing though that has more to do with the fact I'm so happy such a character even exists. And of course Amy Poehler should win!

Bones was so tragically bad a couple of weeks ago. It felt like they were trying way too hard with every storyline, Hodgins and Angela getting no sleep, Booth being overprotective, Brennan being stubborn. Even the storm chasers and the magic love trailer. And I don't know...I feel like Booth was painted as being somewhat rational in his overprotective inclinations towards Brennan and like OF COURSE HE'S THIS WAY HE'S THAT KIND OF MANLY MAN and it was just ick all over the place for me because Brennan is not unreasonable and there is absolutely no reason to believe she wouldn't take care of her child and herself. And that joke at the end was so bad, with Booth telling her she needed to wear socks on their hardwood floors because she might get a splinter that I found myself seriously considering quitting the show for good YET AGAIN.

Revenge's mid-season finale actually got me interested in the show again a little bit. The problem is that Daniel is my favorite character and apparently he was killed off in the pilot, right? So every week I continue to like him and be like, CURSES!!! HE'S GOING TO DIE!!! But my friend said there's a big fake death in The Count of Monte Cristo? So fingers crossed for that! I have to admit I was confused by all that stuff that guy was saying to Emily this week about how she was in love with Daniel, because LOL I haven't seen it yet. Also Jack kinda creeps me out the way he was all into Emily and then Amanda (the real Emily) comes along and when he finds out who she is, he's all into her. It's just...not my thing.

Gossip Girl's midseason finale was both frustrating and well, parts of it were good. I'm really tired of the Chuck and Blair merry-go-around and also Blair Waldorf, frozen, unable to breathe, or make a decision for herself about what man she wants to be with let alone unable to consider the thought of being alone (quelle horreur!) is really something I NEVER wanted to see on the show. But Dan was so sweet and even if there's no reason on God's green earth anyone should think Chuck is truly a reformed man, I really doubt we're watching Dan be all kinds of perfect for it not to eventually end up somewhere good for Dan and Blair, the only reason I'm still watching this show. Sigh. Also, LOL at Gossip Girl having another "Will Chuck survive?" cliffhanger when they'll only disappoint us at the show's return and he's still alive.

AND FRIENDS! You know how I talk about The Secret Circle on here and you always ignore those parts of my posts and comment on The Vampire Diaries? Well the CW is running a marathon of The Secret Circle and you can catch up! And then we can talk about the witches togetherrrrr! Watch! Watch! Watch!

Are you planning on watching any of the new midseason shows? I'll be giving several of them a try, Alcatraz, Good Christian Belles, Touch, and also so excited that Switched at Birth is coming back January 3rd, wheeee!

Holidays!

Tomorrow is my turn for the Virtual Advent, which is exciting. I have family coming in this week as well which should be fun. I'm currently reading the most delightful British Christmas romantic comedy which is very comforting because even though everyone's lives are out of control at the moment, I know everything will turn around for the best at the end. It's what I always hope for in my own life. Tis the season.

I hope you are all having the best of times and not the worst of times! Drop me a comment and tell me how you are and what you're up to....

PS I have written this whole post in blogger's new interface. Having reached the end, I think I can officially say that I really like it.

Announcing the Faith and Fiction Round Table for 2012

For the past two years, I've hosted the Faith and Fiction Round Table as an email group and the hope was that by posting on our various blogs we'd be able to spread the discussion of the themes of the books we read enough so that people could join in without actually having to read the books. Well, I have to admit it was a bit of a failure. The books weren't always great, people would always drop out of the discussion due to their busy schedules and I could never communicate the idea of thematic posts over reviews well enough to participants. So for 2012 I've decided to take a different approach. With the help of Hannah, I've chosen four books, one for each quarter. It's totally open and I'm just hoping that people will choose to read the posts and either post on their own blogs or join the discussion here. I'm really really hopeful that people smarter than me will join in the discussion and read the books because to be honest, that's what makes this kind of experience for me. I don't just want to read significant books in isolation, I want to discuss them and hear different perspectives, and sit with them for awhile. So don't be shy! Please make room in your schedules for any of these books that appeal to you. I will probably be hyping this because I'm a little bit scared no one will be interested enough to join in.

Okay here's the schedule!



March 31st Discussion: Memento Mori by Muriel Spark

In late 1950s London, something uncanny besets a group of elderly friends: a voice on the telephone informs each, “Remember you must die.”

Their geriatric leathers are soon thoroughly ruffled by these perhaps supernatural phone calls, and in the resulting flurry many old secrets are dusted off. Cracks appear on the once decorous surface of their lives––unsavories like blackmail and adultery are now to be glimpsed. Spooky, poignant and wickedIy hilarious, Memento Mori may deal in death, but it is a book which leaves one relishing life all the more.



June 30th Discussion: Viper's Tangle by Francois Mauriac

The masterpiece of one of the twentieth century’s greatest Catholic writers, Vipers’ Tangle tells the story of Monsieur Louis, an embittered aging lawyer who has spread his misery to his entire estranged family. Louis writes a journal to explain to them—and to himself—why his soul has been deformed, why his heart seems like a foul nest of twisted serpents. Mauriac’s novel masterfully explores the corruption caused by pride, avarice, and hatred, and its opposite—the divine grace that remains available to each of us until the very moment of our deaths. It is the unforgettable tale of the battle for one man’s soul.



September 29th Discussion: Gilead by Marilynne Robinson

Twenty-four years after her first novel, Housekeeping, Marilynne Robinson returns with an intimate tale of three generations from the Civil War to the twentieth century: a story about fathers and sons and the spiritual battles that still rage at America's heart. Writing in the tradition of Emily Dickinson and Walt Whitman, Marilynne Robinson's beautiful, spare, and spiritual prose allows "even the faithless reader to feel the possibility of transcendent order" (Slate). In the luminous and unforgettable voice of Congregationalist minister John Ames, Gilead reveals the human condition and the often unbearable beauty of an ordinary life.

Gilead is the winner of the 2005 Pulitzer Prize for Fiction.



December 1st Discussion: The Final Martyrs by Shusaku Endo

Eleven short, deeply spiritual stories ranging from autobiographical serendipities to solemn, empathetic parables. The title story is set during the 18th-century Shogunate persecution of Christians in Japan and was the basis for Endo's book Silence. Shusaku Endo is the winner of the Akutagawa prize (the Japanese equivalent to the Pulitzer) and his books have been widely translated. Martin Scorsese is currently working on a film adaptation of Silence

I feel like we've come up with a really nice assortment of books and I hope at least one of these catches your eye as a book you'd like to join in discussion for! Mark it on your calender! All of these books are in print, so hopefully you can find them at your library or bookstore or of course in ebook!

Please let me know in comments if you're interested in joining the discussion of any of these books...I won't hold you to the commitment, but it will help me know what to expect.

Review: The End of the Affair by Graham Greene

It's strange how the human mind swings back and forth, from one extreme to another. Does truth lie at some point of the pendulum's swing, at a point where it never rests, not in the dull perpendicular mean where it dangles in the end like a windless flag, but at an angle, nearer one extreme than another? If only a miracle could stop the pendulum at an angle of sixty degrees, one would believe the truth was there.

Not all love stories are positive ones and not all loves are healthy or right. The End of the Affair is the kind of book that demonstrates just how poisonous and destructive an obsessive and possessive love can be. And it's not overly dramatic in any way nor does it romanticize or endorse the love between the main characters. It just is. And in all honesty, I really appreciate that because I think it can be really easy to romanticize those kinds of feelings of passion but also to go to the other extreme and forget what is real about them. So I think The End of the Affair finds the right balance.

But it's not just about this destructive love affair between Bendrix and Sarah but it's also about belief and how we use it in our lives and also how we sometimes hate the very thing we previously thought we didn't believe. In order to discuss this book I'm just going to assume you don't mind being spoiled on all the plot details. It's a really short book but packed with ideas and I think the general idea of it is well known, it's not like one of those books where's there's a twist and you'll hate me for spoiling it.

So the story starts with Bendrix and is told from his perspective. He's walking home and he meets Henry who just so happens to be the husband of his former lover. He's kind of surprised but they get a drink together and Henry tells him that he's worried Sarah's seeing someone. This causes all the old jealousy and possessiveness to flare up in Bendrix once again. After all, Sarah simply cut him off without telling him why and he has a lot of unresolved feelings. Henry confesses he's considered hiring a private detective to look into it and Bendrix encourages him, but Henry ultimately backs down. Bendrix sees Sarah for a brief moment and it sets off all his old feelings...it's been nearly a year and a half and once she's back in the forefront of his mind and this idea that's she may have begun another relationship with someone else haunts him. And so he ultimately decides to take matters into his own hands and goes to the private detective on his own to find out about Sarah's new affair.

The set-up is in many ways interesting--an affair is a betrayal to begin with so his lack of trust in Sarah makes a certain kind of sense, like the first time they are together in her house, she notes the squeaky step to him, and it haunts him--how does she know about the squeaky step? But it goes far beyond that...even when they were together he would constantly badger her about her love for him, certain there was no way it was real and no way it could last. As he says, "Insecurity is the worst sense that lovers feel: sometimes the most humdrum desireless marriage seems better. Insecurity twists meanings and poisons trust." He's rabidly jealous of her and sees his jealousy as proof of his love and as such is unable to see her love for him, because she is not jealous of him in the same way. He would prefer to see her dead or to be dead over ever seeing with her another man, even though she only wishes for him to be happy. This way in which he loves her is far more of an obsession, he does not value her well being. And his paranoia creates cracks in their relationship, he is verbally cruel and there is no possible way she can assure him of her love enough. She even says, "He is jealous of the past and the present and the future. His love is like a medieval chastity belt: only when he is there with me, in me, does he feel safe."

The private detective turns up many things including Sarah's actual diary, which provides Bendrix with both insight into Sarah's feelings (yes she really loved him) and why she cut him off. So what happened is that this all takes place during the war and there was an air raid one night and Bendrix happened to be hurt right after he and Sarah were together. And Sarah saw him lying there after the bombing she thought he looked dead and she was overcome with grief. And so she prays to God and she tells him that if he lets Bendrix live she'll believe in him even though she doesn't now. But she realizes that belief isn't much of a sacrifice to make, she's not actually offering God very much, so she vows that she'll give Bendrix up if he lets him live. And she says, "People can love without seeing each other, can't they, they love You all their lives without seeing You." And lo and behold Bendrix is alive and Sarah feels determined to keep her vow. She isn't particularly happy about it, though, she in fact feels dead inside.

The thing about Sarah is that the book suggests she loves Henry but she is not in love with him. Their sex life is passionless, she's had many affairs, but Bendrix is the man she falls in love with and she promises she loves him more than she's ever loved anyone and that holds true in the diary. But also she doesn't think much of herself, she rather hates herself, and wishes that she could find someone who would accept her fully for who she is. And you can't help but look at the way the men in her life loved her, as if she were a possession, (when her husband tells her he loves her, she says it's as if he's laying claim to her) and a third man she meets and discusses God with says that love can be explained away as a "desire to possess....to find another mother or father." If there was such a thing as unconditional love for Sarah from God you could see how appealing it would be.

Sarah struggles with her vow, she hadn't had much faith in God before, but now she's made this vow and she feels as if she must keep it. She befriends a man who does not believe in God and she considers their conversations. She wonders why her friend, Richard, hates the God-fairytale but does not hate the Devil-fairytale. And she wonders is it's possible to have love without hate. (the love/hate of it all is a theme in the book) and that leads her to realize, "Oh God, if I could really hate you, what would that mean?"

Sarah isn't steadfast, though, she's tempted to leave Henry for Bendrix but her plans are thwarted. And once Bendrix reads the diary, he believes they can be together, because after all, he does not believe in God so he thinks the vow is meaningless. And then some other stuff happens, I'll leave a little discovery to you if you decide to read the book.

But it's amazing to me how this book manages to both detail maybe...the worst way in which human love can go? And also at the same time an interesting perspective on faith, Sarah's faith is born out of unusual circumstances and equated with suffering. Faith is suffering, but once she has it she doesn't let it go. She longs to return to Maurice, but believes at the same time she will pay some sort of price breaking her vow. So once she makes the vow, once she opens herself up to the idea of belief, she's actually created a barrier between herself and Bendrix that can never be crossed.

And there's some other interesting ideas in here as well about the relationship between the material and the divine, the physical and the spiritual. Bendrix believes he can only love Sarah by physically being with her, the act of sex itself the ultimate act of love, but Sarah believes love can continue even if they are not physically together, as we love God even though we have no physical knowledge of him. Bendrix actually considers his love with Sarah to be superior to any love she had for God in the end, because he was the one who was physically with her.

Sarah's belief forces Bendrix to consider his own belief. And he doesn't believe in God and yet he hates him and is jealous of him. And it's interesting because he asks the reverse of Sarah's question, she wondered if one could hate without love, and Bendrix wonders if one could both hate AND love. And Bendrix himself feels most human, most normal when he manages to forget Sarah or not think of her.

I don't know, it's a pretty fascinating read. I think there are all these other ideas in the book as well, but the relationship between Bendrix and Sarah and the way the vow disrupts their lives and forces them to examine their beliefs is interesting. The intense jealousy and possessiveness of Bendrix is both troubling and enlightening. The amount of self-loathing both characters feel is so sad. And yet...there are these other things, like how "me too" signifies to them how they've shared their journey, and they're not alone and how when Sarah dies Bendrix feels as if he's lost half of his memories that bring a degree of universality and understanding to this twisted relationship. Oh and it's pretty easy to read, jam packed with ideas but not with antiquated language. I think it's well worth a read if you have the time and these ideas interest you.

Fun notes! The Vampire Diaries Season 3 episode 3 is titled "The End of the Affair" and Gossip Girl's next episode in January is titled "The End of the Affair?" I think based on the preview GG's is likely to be a more direct reference.

Rating: 4.75/5
Things You Might Want to Know: the sex is like, barely there
Source of Book: paperbackswap I think
Publisher: Penguin Classics Deluxe Edition